Derby lesson number 1: You are never to swag for pads.


Posted on 13th February, by Martin in Roller Derby. No Comments

I’m kicking off with this reminder, before I even start with the tale of first training, because it’s important.

I decided to break in my new skates (Riedell R3s) with a tootle round the local rink, and dutifully headed off with a backpack filled with Scabs and Bullets. It’s amazing what a floor full of kids can do for your resolve, and when I get to ‘skates on’ time I think to myself ‘I didn’t fall last time, I’ll be fine’.

I believe they call those things; famous last words.

In fairness I wasn’t skating, I was tottering around on the carpet on my toe-stops – one of which was slightly loose. Down I went like a ton of spuds, straight back onto my elbows (thankfully avoiding my backside) and gifting myself a huge black bruise and a graze.

Anyway… training.

First of all, off skates warm up involved jogging (!) I need to pick up the pace. I am not the fittest of girls, but I am determined to be better, and I got cramp in my arse… how is that even possible?? Nothing says nice to meet you like a six foot weirdo randomly massaging their own ass!

The Nottingham Roller Girls WK3 training session took the form of t-stops, skating on the one leg (in straight lines and around corners) and some sidestepping/grapevine and fairy steps which culminated in a thoroughly enjoyable game of Grandma’s footsteps – I may have won the second game!!

I did fall down again and holy hell does it hurt when you land on your tail bone, but you get back up, you laugh that it hurt and you carry on with your damn t-stops. All I can really hope is that Ruth Hurts didn’t catch me hitting the deck on her GoPro.

I kept thinking about the girls who were there who hadn’t skated before and how there is no way on earth I’d be able to do it. I remember my first skating experience, at a birthday party at Rollerworld, Derby, and the complete lack of skill I had on the maple. I don’t know how I’ve come this far without some kind of instruction, but I’m here and I’m ready to do this.

I was asked if I wanted to come back the following week.

I’ll see you on Monday 😉





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